Breaking and Entering

Juan and Carmen shared a connection before they ever even met. Carmen, a Spaniard, had spent her college years living in Juan’s native Venezuela. Though their friend groups overlapped in places, the two never got to know each other. 

The couple only recently realized that they were even on the same flight from Venezuela to Madrid back in 2018, once again without ever crossing paths. But the coincidences don’t stop there: Juan’s grandparents are named Juan and Carmen. And his parents? Also Juan and Carmen. 

This series of extraordinary coincidences firmly convinces the couple that coming together was not just chance, but 100% fate. The twist that truly cements their story? Carmen's spontaneous visit to Juan's house, a surprise that momentarily led Juan to believe that someone broke in and kidnapped his roommate!

Here’s their story.

Editor’s note: Juan’s answers were translated from Spanish.

How did you meet?

Carmen: We met during Pride this year when I went out with my friends from Venezuela. I’m from Spain, but I lived in Venezuela for five years and made a bunch of friends there. Some of them moved to Madrid where we live now. One of them was Juan’s brother, as well as one of my closest friends from college. 

I wouldn’t say Juan and I hit it off from the beginning. He kind of ignored me that night. 

Juan: What did I say to you? 

Carmen: Nothing, just “hi” and then you ignored me.

What was your first impression of Carmen?

Juan: My first thought when I met her was that she had really good vibes. And then later when we were walking and she was in front of me, I thought That ass has to be mine. And I pulled it off. 

But then why didn’t you talk to her?

Juan: I don’t know, I guess I was nervous. I was in the mindset that I was hanging out with my friends. I didn’t want to involve myself in anything else. But later I was talking to a friend we had in common and I told him that this girl really caught my attention. And he gave me her number. 

What did you think the first time you saw Juan’s name pop up on your phone?

Carmen: He texted me when I was at the Taylor Swift concert in Denver. I’m a huge Swiftie, so I was like This is a sign. 

But I was also like “I’m at a concert, so I will talk to you tomorrow. I need to enjoy this.”

How did things grow from there?

Carmen: We started FaceTiming basically every day. He has a very bad sleep schedule, so he would stay up late with me on the phone.

Juan: I think the most important moment when we started talking was the first time we FaceTimed. I was having a hard day and I needed to vent a little. Talking to her felt like I was taking a weight off, and I thought I need to call her. And we started to talk, and I felt so comfortable talking to her. I felt safe and I felt good. And I still do.

How did you finally get together in person?

Carmen: What happened was that I was coming back on August 1st or 2nd to my hometown in northern Spain, in Galicia. I was at JFK having the longest layover ever. I was going to keep traveling for the rest of the month, and while I was talking to my mom she said why don’t you just go straight to Madrid? 

So I changed my flight. But I didn’t tell Juan, he thought I was still going to Porto where my mom was going to pick me up and drive me home. I schemed this little plan with a friend of ours where I would go to his house and wait for him to come back from work. 

You planned a surprise to meet him for the first time? 

Carmen: Yes. He was shocked. We hadn’t seen each other since that first night we met. It was pretty surreal. But luckily it worked out and we spent the rest of that week together. 

What went through your head when this happened, Juan?

Juan: Well, at first I thought my roommate had been kidnapped. They never left the windows open. Everything was opened. Everything felt really off as soon as I walked in the house. But once I walked into the living room I found her and I was so confused. I started laughing, it was really emotional. 

What did you do for your first date?

Carmen: We basically stayed there and talked for a while. He was touching my hand like I cannot believe you’re here. We cooked, too. And we did some adult stuff.

That next day we spent the day at the pool and got to know each other outside of our phone screens. It was a very long month with expectations and wanting to be with each other. 

Juan, had you ever reached out to anyone the way you did with Carmen after the first time you met?

Juan: No. That was really out of the ordinary for me. My first message to her was actually written by my friend. I wasn’t brave enough to message her. My friend took my phone and reached out for me. I never would’ve done it on my own. 

Had you ever surprised anyone like that, Carmen? 

Carmen: I’m spontaneous, but not when it comes to things like this. I was shitting bricks. I was like “Oh my god, what if he doesn’t like me when I get there? What if he doesn’t like the surprise?” But I’m so glad I did it and followed my mom’s advice. 

I know he’s a very private person, so the fact that he received me with his arms open was so important to me.

🤔 Poll

📊 Last Week We Asked…

• [poll] “How would you overcome "cold feet" early on in dating (or a new relationship)?”

  • 22% said “Take a break to reassess”

  • 47% said “Communicate any doubts to my partner”

  • 14% said “Cut things off”

  • 17% said “Give it another chance”

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Interviewed and transcribed by Nicolas Vega. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.